Before: I can't stop the thoughts about what life would have been like if it hadn't happened.
Now: When I miss my child, I am rid of the constant guilt. I can hold my head up.
Before: I felt extreme anger and bitterness at my boyfriend, disappointment and disbelief in myself and constant grief and hopelesness.
Now: I feel hope for continued healing, a desire to help others not make my same mistake and renewal in the feeling that this one action did not have to define me.
Before: I was so afraid someone would find out I had three abortions. One was bad enough, but no one would understand why I did it again.
Now: I ache with loss. But now I mourn them as children, not just what I did. I am forgiven and can forgive myself. Meeting others who had multiple abortions eased my shame.